By the Ocean
Cloudy 74 Degrees
For today’s issue we reach into the archive for the annual reading of the interwebz classic, “Twas the Night Before Launch,” written by yours truly after probably one too many cups of coffee or maybe merlot.
(Adapted by yours truly from “The Night
Before Christmas” by C. Clement Moore)
Twas the night before launch when all through John’s house,
the pixels were popping and so was his mouse.
The emails were written, the blog posts were done,
still left was the sales page and that wouldn’t be fun.
For John was still looking for more reasons why,
his prospects should go to his website and buy.
The hook was just right and the headline did sing,
but would it convert and end in cha-ching?
John started to worry as minutes ticked by,
his ideas were slowing, the well running dry.
He looked through his swipe file but nothing jumped out.
All those old headlines were very worn out.
John soon did decide that the worst thing to do,
would be just to sit there and let himself stew.
Instead he would try something else for this test,
so he quickly stopped working and took a short rest.
With his head on the desk and the lights down real low,
John soon drifted off with his screen still aglow.
The dream started quickly, the story well known,
back at his old job with THE Mr. Jones.
Tom Jones was his name and he was the boss,
he screamed and he yelled and he always was cross.
“You can’t go home now,” yelled Tom in a tizzy,
“The project’s not done, stop talking, get busy!”
“It’s now 8PM and my family’s home waiting,”
“I won’t stay around and take this berating.”
But instead of exploding or throwing a fit,
John simply stood up and just said, “I quit…”
Now as he walked out a small smile did form,
for John this old job would no more be the norm.
His new job would be to take charge of his time,
to design each new day, and sleep in well past nine.
John now had a secret, he knew it was true,
a job wouldn’t be something he’d ever do.
Just then passed a thought that John sure did enjoy,
he’d never again be called an employee.
To commit to his choice and protect him from doubt,
John removed any way he could ever opt out.
He cut all his job ties and burned all his bridges,
his boat would soon sink or would float him to riches.
John started a business with products online,
he wrote and he published and leveraged his time.
He worked and he worked and soon it did pay,
twelve hundred new dollars in just 30 days.
John was ecstatic and started to see,
how building his new life was well within reach.
Of course it was work, but work that was fun,
it sure beat that job that John hated a ton.
From that day and forward, John knew he was hooked,
on selling his courses and products and books.
His plan was so simple, just rinse and repeat.
This internet business was turning out sweet!
So there he sat sleeping, his head on the desk,
just hours away from his next real world test.
John needed ideas and he needed them fast,
or else this big launch might just be his last.
Just at that moment, something stunning occurred.
John heard a loud voice that was shouting two words.
“More Value” the voice shouted right in his ear,
“Add something else, then have no more fear.”
“Forget all the tricks that you learned from the gurus,
fake scarcity, pressure, those tactics will screw you.
The folks you are helping can quickly see through that,
so do something better or your launch will go splat.”
“Just add some more value, your launch will be dandy,
they’ll eat up your offer like pink cotton candy.
Marketing tactics are spokes on a wheel.
In the end, what they most want is just a great deal.”
The answer was clear and John knew that he knew it.
By skimping on value, he nearly just blew it.
He changed up his offer and added more stuff,
and soon he was sure he had added enough.
John made his last changes and then he hit “SEND,”
His launch took off fast and when it did end,
His buyers were happy, his bank account full,
John stood up and shouted, “This is so cool!”
From there he kept working and building his dream,
his success kept on growing, so easy it seemed.
John’s gratitude showed, how good could life get?
He could do what he loved, all thanks to the NET.